Cranks My Tractor

I love you to the MoonPie and back

It was a Monday, my 30 minute commute back home from work was looking like it was going to take 3 hours. It ended up taking only two hours and 45 minutes. At one point, I sat still under an overpass on the interstate for an hour. It gets boring and frustrating. There was no getting off the interstate, so I just sat and thought and listened to the radio. A little AM radio station plays wonderful music, I was thankful for that as I sat in my car watching people get out of their cars and talk and stretch.

Moon River came on the radio and it made me happy. It made me think of the movie, “Breakfast at Tiffany’s” – a movie before my time, but one that I enjoy. I think of Audrey Hepburn sitting in that window, singing and strumming on a guitar. It’s easy to think while stuck in traffic.

Bread Stuffing

Do not worry, this story has a happy ending. I have to say that because of my Mama, who spent time as a Baptist missionary and would have wanted me to make it clear before getting into the details. She would also want me to say that I understand the importance of taking communion at church and that I understand the meaning.

I said it.

Some of my fondest memories of church as a little boy involve getting to drink the leftover Welch’s Grape Juice and eat the Nabisco Premium Saltine Crackers. We went to a small church in a very rural area of Alabama; we didn’t have fancy communion bread and it was a dry county. Even if it weren’t dry, we still wouldn’t have used the hard stuff.

Years later, at my church, I get to work the left door at church and stand on the end of the aisles and manage the offering plates and communion trays. I take my shift every third month. We have communion on the first Sunday of every month and I’ve been doing this for a long time, so I know the ropes.

Wicked Apples and Rocket Science

What do rocket guys and girls talk about at work for fun? Well, the same things everyone else talks about. Sure, there are those who are really determined “to win the Pinewood Derby” this year. They will again get beat by the boy or girl whose daddy is good at woodworking or is a mechanic or plumber.

The topic most of the time is related to family, sports and cooking. That’s right – cooking. A lot of aerospace folks, particularly men fancy themselves as chefs. Whether it be on the grill or in the kitchen. These guys who get the rocket science questions on a daily basis seem to love the Food Network, working in the garden and discussing ways to save time (or waste time) on a lot of other household tasks.

One friend at work collected push lawn mowers that neighbors had given up on, fixed them and strapped them all together for a super wide mowing machine. These are fun folks to be around.

Wearing Your Happiness in the New Year

It was the day after New Year’s Day. I wasn’t thinking about my resolutions – I rarely worry about such things. I generally worry about getting the year right when putting it on documents. 2015 just seems strange to write as a year…

I think of the 80’s, 90’s and of the dreaded 2000 when everything was going to stop working.

Benjamin Franklin had this to say about new years and such, “Be at war with your vices, at peace with your neighbors, and let every new year find you a better man.”

It was the second day of 2015 and I was sitting across from my oldest daughter and son in a café in New Orleans, Louisiana. Just the three of us and I was thinking what a wonderful time we were having.

Chicken and Jumper Cables

One of the big games in the Southeastern Conference this past weekend was the Mississippi State Bulldogs going to Tuscaloosa to play the University of Alabama. A friend offered me a ticket and I jumped at the chance to not only go to the football game, but to see my two daughters who are now both in school at the University of Alabama.

This was a “no-brainer” for me. I spent the “funny money” I earned from Delta Airlines who had inconvenienced me on a previous flight – I even had some funny money left over. In other words, I flew for free from Richmond to Atlanta on the Friday before the game.

The plane was jam-packed and there were even a few folks who were also going to the football game in Tuscaloosa. After a wonderful landing and some thoughtful piddling, I started toward Alabama in a rental car (it was not free, but it was cheap).

Peas and Happiness

As I sat there separating the frozen peas from the frozen carrots, I wasn’t thinking about how religion and politics are similar or even how thankful we should be that Clarence Birdseye invented the flash freezing machine. I was thinking about how cold my fingers were and how there should be some easier way to separate the frozen green spheres from the frozen orange cubes. Maybe I could use some sort of colander that only lets the peas fall through?

This is what I was thinking. I was also thinking about how wonderful I was for volunteering to separate the peas and carrots. Okay, I said it, I admit it. I was looking for just a little more gratitude for performing this laborious task.

It’s something I have done before and something I will do again; perhaps I enjoy it. It seems that the recipe always calls for a cup of frozen English peas and there are no bags of English peas in the freezer – only frozen peas and carrots and sandwich bags of frozen carrots that will forever suffer from separation anxiety. So without pulling politics into the task, I do it.

A Shower in the Baptism Pool

Noting it many times before, I love going to the Farmers’ Market, talking to folks, studying vegetables and getting my boiled peanuts. On this particular Saturday morning, our weather was not so good – it was starting to rain and I needed to pick up the things that I could not live without on this particular day.

To be specific, I wanted a patty pan squash, some green tomatoes and a couple of bags of boiled peanuts. As the rain started to drizzle down, I found three nice green tomatoes and one perfectly sized patty pan squash. Patty pan squash look a little like an inflated flower and they grill up real nice.

Cover Me with Toe Jam and Love Me Like a Cast Iron Skillet

What in the world has this fellow been drinking? Nothing other than the leftover juice from my watermelon rind pickles. It is good for what ails you.

My daughter is spending the summer in Nashville, Tennessee doing an internship and enjoying life - it seems to her daddy. She sends us pictures from shoe shopping; I understand this. She also made it to the Wildhorse Saloon’s 20th Anniversary Celebration, taking advantage of tickets from a friend of a friend.

She also hits the Nashville Farmers Market every chance she gets.

I’m proud of her. Good grades, good country music and she sends me pictures of “Toe Jam.”

Miracles at the Dollar Store

Spend one day at a big amusement park or Major League Baseball game or anyplace they have you “captured” and you will appreciate the art of savvy shopping.

I love roller coasters and baseball as much as anyone, but paying five or six dollars for a soda or three dollars for some water will jump on you like a tick on a fat dog really quick.

My family and I are on vacation in sunny Florida and having a wonderful time, but the costs add up quickly when you are trying to feed five. It seems like I could be feeding 50 for what some of these places charge. I understand. As a matter of fact, I probably am feeding 50 – so I guess that is good.

Opening up a can

Do you want to look younger, lose weight, boost your “bedroom life,” improve your health and treat intestinal worms?

I know what you are saying…

“I hope I don’t have intestinal worms.”

Well, honestly I hope I don’t either.

None of these things crossed my mind when I was pawing through the pantry looking for something to put in a brown paper bag to take for lunch. Sometimes I will take an apple, orange or a banana. Sometimes I will put a box of crackers in my bag or a handful of nuts.